Caskett Moment: Castle's Wall
by lebesgue
Summary: At the beginning of season 5 the writers insinuated that we know much of Beckett's life but did not know much about Castle's. In this story we discover something that happened in his childhood. I'm not native English. If you prefer, the original story is available in Spanish (La muralla del castillo).


Kate Beckett was sitting comfortably on the sofa in her boyfriend's loft. She was reading, or at least she was trying, because she frowned as she was solving an equation. Once in a while she glanced at him, successful novelist Richard Castle, who was writing at his desk, with his eyes drilling his laptop screen and muttering every few minutes.

They had quarreled.

The detective scolded herself for losing concentration and continued reading, or rather, re-reading one of the novels featuring the character based on her: Nikki Heat. Find out that Castle knew her so well and that he had reflected in a fictional character made her dizzy. If one day people found that books kept big resemblance with aspects of his personal life ... she would die of shame.

She glanced again. She saw him stretching in the chair, leaning back with his outstretched arms while puffing. She thought that if he lounged always that way, it was not surprising that he did not meet the deadlines. Of course, she suspected he was play"acting because she was there.

She scolded herself again. She did not want to think about him, just wanted to read. She put the book in front of her eyes, hiding her face from him. If she did not do that, she had seen Rick looking at her for a second.

Kate had crashed smack into Castle's wall. The truth was that she cannot demand anything from him. She knew she had made it difficult for him, with her countless onion layers, but she had been stripped of most of them gradually. He was the only one who knew the real Kate Beckett.

Castle had 'something' that caught his attention from the very beginning , call it 'charming'. It was the way he looked at her when they spoke. It made she feel that they were a pretty good team.

Rick certainly had many things that exasperated her, but they were minor things. But it hurt when she was waiting in front of castle wall and he was reluctant to open the door for her to enter. Today an old photo had aroused the curiosity to ask him about his childhood and he had left she waiting in the moat with the crocodiles.

He heard a cough in front of her. Kate lowered the book keeping her frown and saw Rick standing with a smile, waving a pen with a piece of paper, like a white flag.

" I come in peace " he said, in case it was not clear.

She could not suppress a smile. She put the book aside and reached. He handed her the makeshift flag.

" I think I'm going to collect it " she said as she sat up on the couch to let him seat.

He sat down and then Kate realized he had a wooden box in his other hand. It looked like a cigar box. She looked at it curiously, she looked up and stared at his eyes, expectant. Castle turned serious, with the box resting on his knees and remained a few seconds in silence, fiddling with the lock. Kate thought it was weird to see him so formal, her heart began to accelerate.

" Do you know when I began to write? " he said after a few seconds.

" Of course " she said surprised " that love letter you wrote to a girl at school when you were ...

Rick shook his head, his head down, like a little child. Beckett said no more and waited silently for him to speak.

" That was later, and yes ... is the 'official' version, because that sells more books than the truth. " he said with resignation.

" Then, the eternal Casanova is ... an invention? " She said laying her hand on his forearm, tenderly. Kate was surprised herself: she was not angry anymore. He smiled more lively.

" I'm going to tell you a story that nobody else knows. Well, maybe my babysitter, and I say 'maybe' because I don't know if she remembered it, you know... " He made a gesture with his hand indicating a excessive fondness for alcohol.

Rick started telling her that, at that age, he was crazy about medieval knights in armor, slaying dragons, living in castles, with their shields and swords.

" I forced my mother to make me a cardboard armor lined with foil. You know the skills of my mother " he said grimacing with complicity, that made Kate smile " I looked like a stingy robot, but I still loved it.

He insisted on going to play at Belvedere Castle in Central Park. He was so insistent that one day off school , the nanny grudgingly took him, instead of their usual marathons watching TV at home, which was more comfortable for her.

" I wanted to go in armor, of course."

" Otherwise it would have surprised me, Castle."

They both smiled. He told her how he spent the morning playing with other kids, because it was a usual place for families to spend the holidays. He was very hot, because his cardboard armor so he asked the nurse for a soda.

" That woman was so tired that he gave me some money, she sent me off to a distant stand and she waited sitting on a park bench."

Kate thought the nanny was very irresponsible, but said nothing. Rick explained that there were many people standing in line, he got the last, behind some guys older than him. When they saw how he was disguised, the boys began to shake him and laugh at him.

" In spite of my innate qualities to fight ... " He shook his head to make Kate laugh " Next thing I remember is that I was biting the dust and my armor was shattered."

Fortunately a man who also was queuing, scared the kids and helped him up. He saw himself surrounded by a few curious, this kind man smiling and pieces of cardboard and aluminum foil scattered on the lawn.

" He asked me where my father and mother were " Castle paused pursing his lips " And I began to cry."

Kate was saddened to see him so touched while remembering that moment. No words came out, all she could do was keep listening. She grabbed his hand.

" Until then I had not thought how it would be to have a father, but then ... " He squeezed her hand " I realized that if my father had been there, with me, that kids would not have broken my armor. I thought... maybe I needed a father. I thought ... I wanted a father. I thought ... well, I thought a lot and I kept thinking for days."

Kate was feeling great tenderness for the child that Castle had been. She could not imagine a childhood without her dedicated parents, and she was realizing that for her boyfriend it had been different. That made her admire him more, because he managed to overcome it and find his way in life.

" Without knowing why, I began to write. I wrote how my father had scared those kids in the park. And I felt better. It was not real, but it was the closest thing to a father that I could experience. I paid attention to my friends' dads ... and when I was in a situation which I felt it would be different with my father, I wrote it."

Rick handed her the box and she took it. She was surprised how heavy it was. He reached into the pocket of his shirt and gave her a tiny key. Excited and anxious Beckett opened the lock. When she opened the lid she did not expect what she found.

" ... Castle? " she said seriously while looking at the contents.

" What? " He said as he bent and looked, horrified, that there was one of his old adult magazines over everything.

" Have you been teasing me, Rick? " She said annoyed.

" No, no! ... No, Kate. I did not remember 'that'. " He said sincerely.

Quickly he removed the magazine and took a huge wad of handwritten pages, sheets and notebook papers, with a pretty careful child calligraphy . He handed the wad to her and pulled the box with the porn magazine aside, closing the lid to not be distracted.

After the little mishap, she regained interest. Kate flipped through the pages as if flipping through a book, and looked surprised how much he had written.

Then she realized that all the effort Castle makes to be nice to everyone, had to come from his childness: when he felt empty and filled his life with the bundle of stories that she had now in her hands.

" Oh my God, Castle. This is ... " she said flipping the pages, now more carefully. She remained speechless, not knowing what to say.

" I want you to read it all. Well, don't be fussy with the style ... " He looked at her a little nervous " ... and forgive misspellings."

" I'm impressed, Castle. " She said, as if she had been hypnotized by those yellowed papers.

" And I want you to know, Katherine Beckett ... " He paused, she paid him full attention " you'll be the very first person to read it all."

" ... The very first? " She asked surprised.

" And the one. " He answered firmly.

Kate felt her heart racing. No one else, no girlfriend or ex-wife or even Martha or Alexis had read those notes.

" Castle... this is the most... tender and intimate moment that no one has ever shared with me. " She said touched and shocked. He was relieved.

She could no longer resist and throwed herself hugging him on the sofa.

" I guess I'm forgiven. " Said hugging her too.

Kate pulled back a little and gave him a tender kiss on his lips as the only answer.


End file.
